Thriller Night
by Mr. Crash
Summary: Parodies of every song on the Thriller album. I've also added some closing thoughts, and this summary is very important. Thanks for reading. It's been fun, dearies.
1. Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'

Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'  
By Mr. Crash  
  
~~~  
And to kick off this album of parodies is "Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'", a parody of a song by the same name, by Michael Jackson (from the "Thriller" album, of course). It's Link trash-talking Ganondorf.  
  
So it's obviously sung by Link.  
  
~~~  
  
(music starts up)  
  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
  
I'm too high to get over! (yeah, yeah)  
I'm too low to get under! (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle! (yeah, yeah)  
I cause pain like thunder! (yeah, yeah)  
  
I'm too high to get over! (yeah, yeah)  
I'm too low to get under! (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle! (yeah, yeah)  
I cause pain like thunder! (yeah, yeah)  
  
I'll send you, mister, to the doctor  
With a bone break, but nothing to be found  
By the time this hit the street  
They said I caused a breakdown!  
  
I'll be always tryin' to start you mister cryin'!  
Talkin', squealin', lyin'!  
Sayin' you just wanna be startin' somethin'!  
  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
  
I'm too high to get over! (yeah, yeah)  
I'm too low to get under! (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle! (yeah, yeah)  
I cause pain like thunder! (yeah, yeah)  
  
You love to pretend that you're good!  
Though you're always up to no good!  
You really can't take it from her,  
So you went from tongue to razor!  
  
You are always tryin' to keep somebody cryin'!  
Treacherous, cunnin', declinin'!  
You got them all be cryin'!  
  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
  
I'm too high to get over! (yeah, yeah)  
I'm too low to get under! (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle! (yeah, yeah)  
I cause pain like thunder! (yeah, yeah)  
  
I'm too high to get over! (yeah, yeah)  
I'm too low to get under! (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle! (yeah, yeah)  
I cause pain like thunder! (yeah, yeah)  
  
Ganondorf is always talkin',  
When nobody else is talkin'!  
Tellin' lies and rubbin' shoulders!  
So they called his mouth a motor!  
  
He always be tryin' to start somebody cryin'!  
Talkin', squealin', spyin'!  
I say you just wanna be startin' somethin'!  
  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
  
I'm too high to get over! (yeah, yeah)  
I'm too low to get under! (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle! (yeah, yeah)  
I cause pain like thunder! (yeah, yeah)  
  
I'm too high to get over! (yeah, yeah)  
I'm too low to get under! (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle! (yeah, yeah)  
I cause pain like thunder! (yeah, yeah)  
  
If you can't fight your battles! (yeah, yeah)  
Then don't cause a battle! (yeah, yeah)  
And don't think maybe, (yeah, yeah)  
If you can't fight your battle! (yeah, yeah)  
  
You'll be always tryin'!  
To start that child to be cryin'!  
Hustlin', stealin', lyin!  
Now baby's slowly dyin'!  
  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
I said you wanna be startin' sometin'?  
You gonna go be startin' somethin'?  
  
I'm too high to get over! (yeah, yeah)  
I'm too low to get under! (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle! (yeah, yeah)  
I cause pain like thunder! (yeah, yeah)  
  
I'm too high to get over! (yeah, yeah)  
I'm too low to get under! (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle! (yeah, yeah)  
I cause pain like thunder! (yeah, yeah)  
  
Lift my head up high!  
And scream out to the world!  
I know I am someone!  
And I make the truth unfurl!  
Cause I can hurt you now!  
Because you know that's true!  
  
Yes, I believe in me!  
Do you believe, do you?  
  
Help me sing it!  
  
Ma me se, ma me sa, ma ma coo sa!   
Ma ma se, ma ma sa, ma ma coo sa!  
Ma me se, ma me sa, ma ma coo sa!   
Ma ma se, ma ma sa, ma ma coo sa!  
  
(Repeat - fade out) 


	2. Baby Be Mine

Baby Be Mine  
By Mr. Crash  
  
~~~  
Parody of "Baby Be Mine", by Rod Temperton. Second on the album.  
  
Sung by Nabooru.  
  
~~~  
  
I met you on a land that I knew well!  
Every moment puts me under your spell!  
Darlin', let me hold you!  
Warm me in your arms and melt my fears away.  
Show you all the magic that a perfect love can make!  
  
I need you all night and day!  
  
So baby be mine! (Baby you gotta be mine)  
And Link, I'll give you all I got to give.  
So mister, be my boy (all the time).  
And we can be in ecstasy,  
As long as we believe in love!  
  
You couldn't give me reason to change my mind!  
(I guess it's still you thrill me, baby be mine)  
You are all the future that I desire!  
  
Boy, I need to hold you!  
Please share my feelings in heat of love's embrace!  
Show you all the passion burning in my heart today!  
  
I'll never let it fade!  
  
So baby, be mine (baby, you gotta be mine)  
And boy I'll give you all I got to give!  
So baby, be my boy! (all the time)  
You're a great reason to stay alive!  
The reason that I love!  
  
Won't you stay with me under the desert sun.  
I promise you now that I'm gonna be different.  
Baby can't you see that heaven's just begun,  
It's livin' here inside our hearts.  
  
We'll stay here in the mountains, bright and warm!  
(I can't be still you thrill me, baby be mine)  
We'll be a love lasting through all storms!  
  
Boy you got to hold me!  
We can touch the sky and bring light to these dark days!  
Hold me, only you and I can make sweet love this way!  
There's no more I can say!  
  
So baby, be mine (baby, you gotta be mine)  
And man, I'll give you all I got to give!  
So baby, be my boy! (all the time)  
You're a great reason to stay alive!  
The reason that I love!  
  
Baby be my boy!  
And boy I'll give you all I got to give!  
So baby, be mine, baby, be mine!  
You're everything this world could be!  
  
C'mon Link, c'mon Link!  
So baby be mine!  
You're everything this world could be to me!  
  
(repeat to fade) 


	3. The Boy Is Mine

The Boy Is Mine  
By Mr. Crash  
  
~~~  
Second song in a series of parodies of the songs off the "Thriller" album. This is a parody of "The Girl Is Mine", performed by Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney.  
  
Sung by Zelda and Malon.  
  
~~~  
  
Zelda:  
Every night he walks all through my dreams,  
Since I met him from the start.  
I'm surprised I am the only one  
Who is special in his heart.  
  
The boy is mine.  
The doggone boy is mine.  
I know he's mine,  
Because the doggone boy is mine.  
  
Malon:  
I don't understand the way you think  
Saying that he's yours not mine.  
Sending roses, oh, what a silly thing.  
Really just a waste of time.  
  
Because he's mine.  
The doggone boy is mine.  
Don't waste your time,  
Because the doggone boy is mine.  
  
Malon:  
I love you more than she!  
(Take you anywhere)  
  
Zelda:  
But I love you endlessly!  
(Loving we will share)  
  
Both:  
So come and go with me  
Two on the town  
  
Zelda:  
But we both cannot have him!  
So it's one or the other!  
And one day you'll discover!  
That he's my boy forever and ever!  
  
Malon:  
You'll bulid your hopes and be let down,  
Now I really feel it's time.  
  
Zelda:  
I know he'll tell you I'm the one for him,  
'Cause he said I blow his mind.  
  
Both:  
Because he's mine.  
The doggone boy is mine.  
Don't waste your time,  
Because the doggone boy is mine.  
  
Both, alternating:  
He's mine, he's mine.  
No, no, no, he's mine.  
The boy is mine, the boy is mine.  
The boy is mine, the boy is mine!  
  
Malon  
The boy is mine. Yep he's mine.  
The boy is mine, yes he's mine.  
  
Zelda:  
Don't waste your time.  
  
Both:  
Because the doggone boy is mine  
The boy is mine, the boy is mine  
  
(spoken)  
"Zelda, we're not going to fight about this, okay?" "Malon, I think I told you! I'm a lover not a fighter!" "I've heard it all before Zelda, he told me that I'm his forever lover, you know, don't you remember?" "Well, after loving me, he said he couldn't love another." "Oh, is that what he said?" "Yes, she said it, you keep dreaming!"  
  
Malon:  
I don't believe it!  
  
Both:  
The boy is mine (mine, mine, mine)  
  
(Repeat - fade out.) 


	4. Thriller Night (Hero)

Thriller Night (Hero)  
By Mr. Crash  
  
~~~  
And now, the title track of this album of parodies. This one is of "Thriller", by Rod Temperton, performed by Michael Jackson. The whole plot is about a dark and stormy night, and Link is rescuing and protecting a girl. The end part, which is in quotes, is sung/rapped by Ganondorf.  
  
The rest is sung by Link.  
  
~~~  
  
(There are floorboards creaking. A wolf howls. Thunder sounds)  
  
(Music starts up)  
  
It's nearing midnight, and something evil's stepping in the dark.  
Beneath the moonlight, you see a sight that nearly stops your heart!  
You Try To Scream But Terror Takes The Sound Before You Make It  
You Start To Freeze As Horror Looks You Right Between The Eyes,  
You're paralyzed!  
  
But I'm a Hero! Your's tonight!  
And I'm the one that saves you from the beast about strike!  
I'll stop that killer! Stop him right!  
I'll be fighting for your life against a Killer, Thriller tonight!  
  
You see the dead man, and realize there's nowhere left to run.  
I'll stop the cold hand, no need to wonder if you'll see the sun.  
Just close your eyes and I'll stop this thing beyond imagination!  
Girl! But all the while...Is that a creature creepin' up behind?  
You're out of time!  
  
'Cause this is Thriller, Thriller Night!  
And I'm your second chance against the thing with forty eyes!  
You know it's Thriller, Thriller Night!  
You're Fighting For Your Life against ther killer, Thriller!  
  
Night creatures crawl,  
And Death starts to walk in his masquerade.  
There's one escape from the alien jaws this one 6ime  
(They're open wide)  
I'll help you live a long life!  
  
They're out to get you, there's demons closing in on every side  
They will possess you unless you get behind and let me fight.  
Now is the time for you and I to cuddle close together!  
All through the night, I'll save you from the terrorizing fiend,  
I'll make you see!  
  
That I'm a Hero! Your's tonight!  
'Cause I can save you from all those ghosts that could ever dare try!  
Girl, this is Thriller, Thriller Night!  
So let me hold you tight and fight a Killer, Chiller  
Thrilling Thriller here tonight!  
  
(begin rap)  
  
"Darkness falls across the land,  
The midnight hour is close at hand!  
Creatures crawl in search of blood,  
And terrorize your neighborhood.  
  
And whosoever shall be found,  
Will be fought for and pulled down!  
You must stand and face the Hounds of Hell,  
Or rot inside a corpse's shell.  
  
The foul stench is in the air!  
Building up for seven years!  
And grizzy ghouls from every tomb!  
Are closing in, to seal your doom....  
  
And though you fight to stay alive!  
Your body starts to shiver...!  
For no mere mortal can resist......  
The _evil_ of...the Thriller!  
  
Ah-ha-ha-ha, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Ha-ha-ha..."  
  
(creaking of floorboards) 


	5. Eat It

Eat It  
By Mr. Crash  
  
~~~  
This song is "Eat It", parody of "Beat It", by Michael Jackson.  
  
Sung by Rauru.  
  
~~~  
  
(Musical intro)  
  
I want some food, and I want it right now!  
Man, I am so hungry I could eat a cow!  
The fire's in my belly, let me make myself clear  
I'll eat it, I'll eat it.  
  
You better run, you better do what you can!  
I'd love to eat some steak and be a nacho man!  
Don't want it too tough, don't want it too rare.  
So eat it, I'm a hungry man!  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
Just eat it, eat it  
Just eat it, eat it  
Just eat it, eat it  
Just eat it, eat it  
  
I'm gonna eat it, better move while you can!  
I'll say it all again, "I'd like a menu, man."  
If you want to serve me good, better get me some Spam,  
I'll eat it, I'll eat it.  
  
You have to show me that you've got some good food!  
We're talkin' 'bout FOOD! This ain't no truth or dare!  
I'll chomp it, and I'll chew,  
And I'll chow it down fast.  
I'll eat it. I'm a hungry man!  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just Eat it! Eat it! Eat it!  
Eat it, eat it, eat it...  
  
(Instrumental)  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
Just eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eeat it!  
I wanna taste somethin' beefy!  
Showin' how big is my appetite!  
It must be cooked 'till it is just right.  
  
(repeat to fade) 


	6. Zelda Queen

Zelda Queen  
By Mr. Crash  
  
~~~  
Parody of Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean". Fifth song on the album.  
  
Sung by Link.  
  
~~~  
  
She was more like a beauty queen from a movie scene  
I said, "Don't mind, but what do you mean 'I am the one  
From the dream, in the green, with the stone.'?"  
She said I am the one from the dream, in the green with the stone.  
  
She told me her name was Zelda Queen, as she caused a scene.  
Then her head turned, with the mind that dreamed of the one.  
From a dream, in the green, with the stone.  
  
People always told me, be careful what you do!  
Don't go around and get killed 'fore it starts!  
And Saria always told me "Be careful who you trust,  
And be careful what you do, 'cause the lie becomes the truth!" Hey hey!  
  
Zelda Queen is not my lover!  
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one!  
But I'm a kid on the run!  
She says I am the one! But I'm a kid on the run!  
  
For a day and for another night  
She was on my side.  
But who can stand when she's in demand  
Of being in air.  
'Cause I fought in a fish all the while.  
So take my strong advice: Just remeber to always think twice.  
Do think twice! (Do think twice!) Wahoo!  
  
I held her up 'till it was nearly three  
As she hindered me.  
Then told a story of a ring with sapphires bright.  
Go on, fight for the girl all the while.  
  
People always told me, be careful what you do!  
Don't go around and get killed 'fore it starts!  
She came and stood right by me  
Had the smell of sweet perfume!  
This happened much too soon!  
We met in a dark room! Hey hey!  
  
The Zora's Queen is not my lover!  
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one!  
But we're kids! We're much too young!  
  
Nabooru is not my lover!  
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one!  
But I'm not going to be shuned!  
  
They say I am the one! But girls, I'm not the one!  
They say I am the one! But girls, I'm not the one!  
  
That Malon girl is not my lover!  
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one!  
But we're friends, not in love!  
  
They say I am the one! But girls, I'm not the one!  
They say I am the one! But I know I'm not the one!  
I know I'm not the one!  
  
Zelda Queen is not my lover!  
Zora's Queen is not my lover!  
Nabooru is not my lover!  
Malon girl is not my lover!  
  
Zelda Queen is not my lover!  
Zora's Queen is not my lover!  
Nabooru is not my lover!  
Malon girl is not my lover!  
  
(repeat to fade out) 


	7. It's My Nature

It's My Nature  
By Mr. Crash  
  
~~~  
This is a parody of "Human Nature", by Steve Parcaro & John Bettis, from the "Thriller" album. The 'you' in this is supposed to be Link.  
  
Sung by Malon.  
  
~~~  
  
Looking out,  
Across the nightime.  
You are all to my sleepless eye.  
  
Hear his voice,  
Empty window.  
Sweet seducing sighs.  
Get me out  
Meet him in night time.  
  
Four walls won't hold me tonight  
I love him,  
And I go follow,  
'Cause I know this is right.  
  
If you ask why, why?  
I tell you that it's just my nature  
Why, why, does he do me that way  
If you beg why, why?   
I tell you that it's just my nature  
Why, why, does he do me that way?  
  
Reaching out,  
To love a stranger.  
His electric eyes are everywhere.  
See that boy?  
He knows I'm watching,  
I think he likes the way I stare...  
  
I like lovin' this way.  
I like lovin' this way.  
  
Looking out,  
Across the nightime.  
When we're near my heart begins to beat.  
Reaching out,  
I touch his shoulder.  
I'm dreaming of his deep eyes.  
  
If you ask why, why?  
I tell you that it's just my nature  
Why, why, does he do me that way  
If you beg why, why?   
I tell you that it's just my nature  
Why, why, does he do me that way?  
  
  
(Ad lib - fade out) 


	8. P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)

P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)  
By Mr. Crash  
  
~~~  
Parody of P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing), by James Ingram and Quincy Jones, performed by Michael Jackson, from the Thriller album.  
  
Sung by Zelda.  
  
~~~  
  
Where did you come from baby?  
And ooh won't you take me there  
Right away, won't you baby?  
  
Tender, baby, you've really got me!  
Spark my nature,  
Sugar, soar with me!  
  
Don't you know now  
Is the perfect time?  
We can make it right  
Dim the candle light.  
Then tonight, ease the lovin' pain!  
Let me take it to the max!  
  
I want your love you (P.Y.T!)  
Pretty young thing!  
You need some lovin' (T.L.C!)  
Tender lovin' care!  
And I'll take you there...  
  
I want your love you (P.Y.T!)  
Pretty young thing!  
You need some lovin' (T.L.C!)  
Tender lovin' care!  
I'll take you there...  
(anywhere you wanna go)  
  
Nothin' can stop this burnin'  
Desire to be with you!  
Gotta get to you baby  
Won't you come, it's 'n emergency!  
Cool my fire yearnin',  
Honey, come, let's be free!  
  
Don't you know now is the perfect time?  
I'll go dim the lights  
Just to make it right,  
All the night!  
Hit the lovin' spot,  
I'll give you all I've got!  
  
I want your love you (P.Y.T!)  
Pretty young thing!  
You need some lovin' (T.L.C!)  
Tender lovin' care!  
I'll take you there...  
  
I want your love you (P.Y.T!)  
Pretty young thing!  
You need some lovin' (T.L.C!)  
Tender lovin' care!  
I'll take you there!  
(Anywhere you wanna go)  
  
Pretty young things, repeat after me!  
I said na na na!  
(na na na!)  
I said na na na na!  
(na na na na!)  
I said na na na!  
(na na na!)  
Na na na na!  
(na na na na!)  
I wanna take you there!  
  
I want your love you (P.Y.T!)  
Pretty young thing!  
You need some lovin' (T.L.C!)  
Tender lovin' care!  
I'll take you there!  
  
I want your love you (P.Y.T!)  
Pretty young thing!  
You need some lovin' (T.L.C!)  
Tender lovin' care!  
I'll take you there...  
  
(Repeat - fade out) 


	9. The Women In My Life

The Women In My Life  
By Mr. Crash  
  
~~~  
Parody of the song "The Lady In My Life", by Rod Temperton, off the "Thriller" album. The last, closing song on this parody album....  
  
Sung by Zelda, Malon, Nabooru, and Link.  
  
~~~  
  
Zelda:  
There'll be no darkness tonight,  
Say that our love will shine.  
Just put your trust in my heart  
And we'll meet in paradise.  
You're my only wonder in this world to me,  
A treasure time won't steal away.  
  
Malon:  
So listen to your heart.  
Lay your body next to mine.  
Please fill me with your dreams.  
I can make you feel so right.  
And baby through the years,  
Gonna love you more each day.  
So I promise you tonight,  
That you will always be the man in my life.  
  
Nabooru:  
Lay back in my tenderness,  
Let's make this a night we won't forget.  
Boy, I need your sweet caress!  
This is my one fantasy,  
Two hearts on the beat of ecstasy!  
Come to me...  
  
Link:  
I will keep to myself,  
Through the shadows of the night.  
Let me alone with my world,  
Only then can I feel all right.  
And baby through the years,  
But even when we're old and gray.  
You'll try to love me each day.  
And that's it will always be  
With the women in my life.  
  
  
  
~~~  
Continue on for my closing thoughts... 


	10. Closing Thoughts

Closing Thoughts  
  
  
  
There is a very centeral theme to this whole album of parodies. It's about Link's rejection of all the women who loved him or are supposed to love him in Ocarina of Time. You see, in every song that Link is connected with, I tried to distance it from romance. For example, in "Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'", I made it about Link and Ganondorf fighting. It has nothing to do with romance. In "Thriller Night (Hero)", while I did have Link protecting a girl, I didn't give the girl a name, so that it would not be Link falling in love with another girl. Besides, he's not about Link loving an anonymous girl, he's just doing his job - protecting people from evil.  
  
In "Zelda Queen", which was one of the two original songs that got this whole album going, I made it very clear that Link wasn't interested in love with the girls - "Zelda Queen is not my lover", "Malon girl is not my lover" etc. In fact, the original lyrics were "Zelda Queen is not my lover, she's just a girl who claims that I am the one. But I know Shiek is my one!" in order to make it appear that Link wasn't interested in women, period (I changed the lyrics though, because I was trying to be anti-romance, and Link/Shiek is romance).  
  
And on "The Women In My Life", the closing song, I made it blatantly clear, so that the people who were a bit too thick to pick up on the hints in "Zelda Queen" would see that I was trying to avoid Link being involved in romance.  
  
As for the romance songs, I always made them be one of the girls loving Link, not Link loving one of the girls. "The Boy Is Mine" shows how Zelda and Malon fight over Link (on that song, I tried to work in a line where Link rejects both, but I couldn't manage it), and the other romance songs are all spread among the girls (Zelda, Malon, and Nabooru all sing only one romance song) so that it would not appear as though I was biased towards a specific couple.  
  
I believe very strongly that Link shouldn't have romance with the girls (or guys, for that matter) in the game. This is due to the fact that he rarely sees the same people consistently throughout the game - he talks with Zelda a total of three times in the entire game. Once as a child, once before she is captured by Ganondorf, and once after Ganondorf is defeated. He meets Malon very sparingly as well (in fact, even less than he sees Zelda). As for the other girls - Ruto, Impa, Nabooru - they talk only a few times. In fact, Link spends most of the game talking with Shiek and Ruto, not Zelda and Malon.  
  
I'm tired of visiting the Zelda section and seeing lemons and romance stories in which Link is paired with every single person this side of Hyrule. It's become so extravagent that authors (Link's Queen) are pairing themselves with Link (I'd like to point out that "My Inner Life" is a ridiculous and weak story, with almost ten pages worth of author notes [which are very repetitious]). And I'd very much like it to stop.  
  
I realize that I appear to be acting very contradictory, of course. In my other album parody, "1984", I've written many parodies that involve Link being in love with a specific girl (most notably "Hot for Zelda"). But that was just done for fun, and I didn't intend for "1984" to be very thougt-provoking. I also tried to do a little bit to change that - "I'll Wait" is aimed at being any one of the girls loving Link.  
  
In any case, I hope that people enjoyed "Thriller Night", and that I've made a few fans and earned myself some popularity.   
  
Ta, dearies.  
  
  
  
  
The End 


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